A surprising psalm changed my view on God’s presence during seasons of trial.
In this Close Reading series, biblical scholars reflect on a passage in their area of expertise that has been formational in their own discipleship and continues to speak to them today.
I’ve sung the Psalms for as long as I can remember, first as a kid in church, then as a worship leader from my college days until now. When I was younger, I remember singing at the top of my lungs to worship songs like Martin Nystrom’s “As the Deer” (Ps. 42) and Matt Redman’s “Let Everything that Has Breath” (Ps. 150).
When I became a biblical scholar, I encountered the Psalms in a new way, reading them historically and culturally. Meanwhile, as a worship leader, I help lead people into God’s presence through the singing of the Psalms. At times, reading the Psalms has felt like a conversation with a dear friend who knows me well.
In March 2020, when the world changed all around us due to the pandemic, Psalm 68 redefined the idea of presence for me, just as I was experiencing absence in new ways.
Many of us wrestled with new absences then. I realized how much I took embodied presence for granted, whether in the form of conversations with colleagues and students in my university’s hallways, a hug from a friend, or congregational singing.
At the end of March 2020, I experienced a strange pain in my chest, sending spasms throughout my ribcage and back. This pain continued for almost two months. At first, we thought this might be connected to COVID-19, so I was quarantined for two weeks. After I tested negative, I was able to be with my family again. But though I was in the same room with them, for weeks I couldn’t even handle a small hug; the pain was too intense. Until my pain subsided two …
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